Cupcakes Made In Heaven

Ever since my friend Ira introduced me to this insanely delicious cupcakes, It haunted me like a creepy burglar at night... They have different flavors and you can order these heavenly pieces here.

this is the Good Morning Cupcake (my personal favorite)

5 stars

On Being Care Free...

I already hit the mid-age range. I am 25 and still single, living under my parent’s roof and making money out of writing filth and developing technical shit. Life is too fast for me and the never ending drama never fails to ruin every minute of my day. There are moments when I tried to ignore and just go with the flow but part of me just wanted to give up. I don’t want my first 2011 entry to become nauseating and emoish fucktard piece of crap, but lately things have been pretty much overwhelming.

For the first time in my 25 years of existence, I never celebrated my birthday. I don’t feel like celebrating it because I don’t feel good. There were crap loads that happened before the holidays and it pretty much ruined every occasion that I used to enjoy. Well, it started with how the evil empire became horrible and so impossible to deal with, then came the rise and fall of my unspoken desire for my best friend whom I loved for more than 10 years but refused to accept, the big FB war with one of the closest friend and the dreams that I wanted to pursue but couldn’t because I am too scared to go beyond my comfort zone and needless to say, my non-stop domestic schiz. My life was a total mess and I am like a decaying piece of wood withered in the dessert. So instead of going out and having fun, I locked myself inside my room and dig my grave.

However, after the holidays when I forced myself to rise back from the dead and continue living a mediocre life, there were sudden changes. Every piece of crap before the holidays that killed me have somewhat vanished. Well, the evil empire decided to cut the power tripping douche into his position so the evil empire became a little less eviler, then the FB war with that close friend of mine ended sweetly and nice and I am starting to moved on and just accept the fact that my one great love will never be mine. So lo and behold… things been great.

But that didn’t last long… not even long enough to last for a week. I thought I could be stress-free for a month but I was wrong. I received an overseas call from my beloved cousin. She is now in a very delicate situation. Her health is falling apart and I am so fucking worthless because I am here and there she was. I know she has her fiancé and her mom but I want to be there too. I want to hold her hands and say that things will gonna be ok because I am here.

I am aging… and my shits are too impossible to deal with and it keeps on coming and coming and I wanted to just break down and give up. But I can’t…

When I was still in my teenish age, my problems were just so simple. And what I always do to keep those problems away was to run away and be with my Hampstead friends. My Aunt owns a condo somewhere near my house and whenever I encounter my shitload drama that is my safe house. I have friends there that, I don’t know… they are care free, funny and awesome. That place is my fantasy world because whenever I am there, I tend to forget the real shitty life I have. It’s like Disneyland for young adults who want to believe that fantasy do exist. But that was before. Now, most of them aren’t here anymore. But tonight, they surprised me with a midnight visit here in my house. I don’t know what happened. I just received a call from them they told me they missed me and they will come by. And I found myself forgetting everything stored for me and just ran away with them. Just like the old times, spontaneous, care free and awesome.

Now I am back here in my room, facing my computer, doing my work and thinking about how screwed my life is. But now, it felt a little lighter, because I just realized, even though my problems aren’t so simple the way it used to be… there are still part of me that isn’t broken. I still have my safe house, I still have my friends and I know I am strong enough and smart enough to make it through. Despite of the shitload and assface people around me, I know I can handle it. I know I can… I just have to add a little faith in myself and became the old me who can whisk any things by just believing.

this shot was taken a few minutes before I wrote this entry... my Hampstead friends...